Valentine’s Day has a way of making people feel like they’re either winning or losing at love. You know the drill—cute couples posting their perfectly aesthetic dates, heart-shaped everything taking over every store, and the underlying pressure to be someone’s someone. But here’s the thing: love isn’t just about being in a relationship. It’s also about how you treat yourself.
Lately, more people have been talking about self-love, and honestly, it’s about time. In a world that constantly tells us we need to be more—prettier, more successful, more lovable—learning to love ourselves has never been more important.
Why Self-Love Isn’t Just a Trend
Self-love isn’t just about bubble baths and treating yourself to coffee (though, let’s be real, those things are great). It’s about how you talk to yourself when no one’s around. It’s about setting boundaries, knowing your worth, and realizing that your value isn’t tied to whether someone buys you roses on February 14th.
And in today’s world? Self-love is essential.
1. Social Media Makes Us Feel Like We’re Not Enough
Scrolling through Instagram can feel like flipping through a highlight reel of what you don’t have. Someone always seems to have the perfect relationship, the dream job, or the kind of confidence that feels unattainable. But here’s the truth: people only show what they want you to see. Learning to love yourself means understanding that your worth isn’t measured by likes, comments, or how “perfect” your life looks online.
2. The Pressure to Have It All Together
There’s this unspoken expectation that by a certain age, you should have your life figured out: the perfect relationship, the dream career, the flawless five-year plan. But real life isn’t that simple. Self-love reminds us that it’s okay to be a work in progress. You don’t have to have everything figured out to be worthy of love and happiness—your timeline is yours, and that’s enough.
3. Burnout Is Real, and We’re All Feeling It
Whether it’s school, work, or just life in general, so many of us are running on empty. We push ourselves to the limit, afraid that if we stop, we’ll fall behind. But here’s the thing: rest isn’t laziness. Taking care of yourself—mentally, physically, and emotionally—is one of the most important things you can do. Self-love is about knowing when to step back and give yourself the same grace you’d give a friend.
4. Healthy Relationships Start With Self-Love
We’ve all heard the cliché that you have to love yourself before you can love someone else, and while it sounds cheesy, there’s some truth to it. When you don’t love yourself, it’s easy to settle for less than you deserve. It’s easy to seek validation from people who don’t treat you right. But when you know your worth, you set the standard for how others should treat you.
How to Practice Self-Love
Okay, so self-love is important—but what does that even look like? Spoiler: it’s more than just face masks and “self-care” days (though those are cool, too).
Talk to yourself like you would a friend. If you wouldn’t say it to your best friend, don’t say it to yourself. Period.
Set boundaries. It’s okay to say no to things that drain you and yes to things that bring you peace.
Celebrate your wins—big and small. Made it through a tough day? That counts. Did something outside your comfort zone? That counts, too.
Give yourself permission to rest. You are not a machine, and you don’t have to earn rest. You deserve it just by existing.
You Are Already Enough
At the end of the day, self-love isn’t about being perfect. It’s about accepting yourself as you are—flaws, mistakes, and all. Valentine’s Day may be all about love, but that doesn’t mean it has to come from someone else.
So whether you’re spending the day with a partner, your friends, or treating yourself to your favorite meal, just remember: the longest relationship you’ll ever have is the one with yourself. And that love? That’s the one that matters most.